My Vampire Faints at Blood Chapter 37

A Coma is a Loss of Consciousness

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"No, no – my dear, you've lost too much blood already, and you have to stay in bed to recuperate. It's too dangerous to be bait, and even if Wayne Loki were really allergic to human blood, I wouldn't ask you to risk it again under any circumstances." Easily guessing what the human doctor was thinking, the vampire hastily pressed him back into bed, but he couldn't help but poke at the set of fake teeth curiously, "But what is this, my dear..."

"I asked those students for them. I wanted to give them to you for therapy, to see if you could gradually get used to the teething process after wearing them a couple of times." Doctor Shang sighed lightly in frustration as his bold idea was mercilessly dismissed and took a bite out of the vampire's arm, "Actually, it feels good to bite, my dear friend, I really suggest you give it a try – I have two new ones, would you like to wear them?"

"No, no, although it does look very realistic, I feel more accustomed to and attached to my own teeth..." The vampire shuddered and shook his head without hesitation, declining the human doctor's warm offer.

Sensing the patient's strong resistance, Sang Haojia, a doctor who advocated for considerate and humane medicine, shook his head regretfully. Releasing his arm, he leaned back on the pillow at the head of the bed, "Speaking of teeth, I'm really surprised – did you really mean what you said back there or were you just trying to scare them? Can purebloods really make other vampires suffer from tooth decay?"

"Naturally, it's true. In fact, as we were leaving, I could already hear Wayne Loki's words beginning to leak out." Meeting the curious gaze of his human, the vampire nodded with a smile. Taking the glass of water floating in mid-air and placing it on the table, he suddenly had a cautious gaze in his eyes, "But he actually managed to resist my suppression and move freely, and the leak is progressing quite a bit slower than I expected, so it seems he does have a lot of power – The first time I used this ability back then, I was kicked out of the palace by Queen Mary before I could say the next word..."

"Did you curse the teeth out of that Bloody Mary?" He vaguely understood the reason why the cruel Mary I disappeared after only a year as the queen as well as the real reason why the other party was expelled from England. Doctor Shang expertly mixed himself a glass of lightly salted water and drank most of it before suddenly realising, as an afterthought, that his wound had already recovered, "How did that happen – Could it be that the blood race not only has strong recovery ability, but also has the ability to heal others?"

"My dear, of course you can understand it that way, as it's actually what this does." With a light smile and a nod, Wei Long picked up the sapphire pendant and leaned down to put it around his neck for him. He gracefully lowered one knee to the ground and held his left shoulder with one hand in a dignified manner, "This holds the power of the altar, the most precious treasure of the Blood Clan, and is the gift I have been preparing to give you. Because I feared it might bring you an unexpected disaster, I had not dared to give it to you directly until now. But now the power inside it has been completely depleted, so even if you take it out, you no longer have to worry about suffering any danger."

"So, you're basically out of your last reserves of food." Looking at the beautifully shaped blue pendant, the practical Doctor Shang did not perceive any particular beauty in it. Draining the rest of the lightly salted water in one gulp, he nodded thoughtfully, "Taking into account the current actual situation, my current blood loss is not very good... but why did you suddenly drop to your knee?"

"Because I feel apologetic. Although we seem to have established a relationship, I still haven't made a decent confession, which is really very ungraceful and ungentlemanly." His tone suddenly changed back to its usual deep affection as the vampire remained half-kneeling before him, gracefully putting one hand on his shoulder and raising his head honestly, "The guide says that at such times, one must kneel and then the other will promise with hot tears to marry the elegant gentleman..."

"..." Doctor Shang blinked with a bewildered expression and looked in silence at the vampire who seemed to be drinking fake blood. 

The atmosphere was eerily quiet for three seconds before Wei Long relinquished his faith in his guidebook, "... Forget it, I'd better stand up."

"Wait, we have to discuss a serious issue." Suddenly aware of the other's extremely dangerous view of companionship, Doctor Shang propped himself up on the edge of the bed and leaned forward, taking the vampire's wrist with a serious grip, "While I do agree that we have established a relationship, this Mr. Vampire, in all previous situations, did you make me the one on the bottom by default?"

Sensing the extreme importance that his human placed on the matter, the vampire hastily shook his head, held up a hand like an oath, and replied sincerely, "No no, my dear – please believe me. According to the secret accounts passed down through the generations of the blood family, you are undoubtedly allowed to be on top as well."

Although it was not as though he had not seen all kinds of strange patients, Doctor Shang had no practical experience at all, and Doctor Shang, who remained simple in some ways, just took the vampire's word for it. As soon as he sighed in relief, his cell phone, which was by his bedside, suddenly rang, "Oh no, if I work overtime now, I'm really not going to be able to do it..."

Hearing the phone ring, Shang Haojia's heart thumped, and he hastily picked it up. Only when he saw the caller ID did his heart settle back down. He leaned back on his pillow with his arms folded, "My beloved Apostle Lord, what's wrong with you again – even Eli doesn't want you?"

"My dear Chips, this time it's serious business. Is your vampire with you? Give him the phone for a moment." The voice on the phone took on a rare seriousness, and Shang Haojia couldn't help but raise his eyebrows slightly. Without further banter with him, he handed the phone to the vampire beside him.

Wei Long took the phone and added another pillow behind him, helping his still bloodless human to lie more comfortably, "It's me, Apostle Muxi – what can I do for you?"

"It's quite a big deal. A vampire with bad teeth bit Eli and he is now lying on the ground unable to move. Vampires are forbidden from attacking other races from seven in the morning to eight in the evening. If I bring it back to the bureau it'll be a big deal, maybe your whole blood family will be sanctioned by association. Can I send it to you first?"

"... Darling, it seems that Mr. Eli has fulfilled your wish to give a mouthful of human blood to Wayne Loki." Based on what was known about the plot, the vampire quickly sorted out the whole thing. Sincerely patting the human doctor on the shoulder, he followed up with a concerned question, "Naturally there's nothing wrong with sending it to me, but is Mr. Eli okay?"

"It's nothing, it was probably the vampire's gaping teeth that largely limited the rate at which he could draw blood, only a sip came out – I healed Eli's wounds and he's now off to Comic Con with the boys." The elf's tone was rather relaxed, it seemed that the innocently traumatised half-blooded chimaera obviously had no serious problems, "It's not that I'm saying that vampires like you, who are already old and suspected to have Alzheimer's, should be told to retire at home and not come out and run around. After biting them and actually lying on the floor and tricking him, I'm still an official elf, so I can't ignore it – I was going to go to Comic Con to have some fun..."

"I'm grateful to Your Excellency the Apostle, could you please be more specific about the circumstances?" The overall result was quite satisfactory, but after a slight estimation of time, the vampire's expression faltered slightly, "Based on the distance between us and the time then, he should have had no teeth left to use to hurt anyone at that point, which is why I was comfortable leaving... Does he still have the energy to bite?"

"There certainly isn't any left now. Now he's lying next to me, crying like a two hundred pound baby." After a moment of rather professional contemplation, the elf returned with certainty, and then suddenly there was a muffled curse on the phone. It was impossible to make out anything, most likely the elf had squeezed open Wayne Loki's mouth and was checking his teeth, "Well... originally he only had one canine tooth, and now it's gone. I can't guarantee how it fell out though, it could have been pulled out by Eli, or it could have been knocked out on the road while he was tricking him – By the way, if Chips isn't working today, can he help check him out? I'm not kidding, he's really swollen like a two hundred pound baby..."

Despite the relative positions, it was hard not to feel some genuine sympathy for Wayne Loki. The vampire coughed lightly and could not resist rubbing his temples, "Very well, thank you, Your Excellency the Apostle, in fact–"

He was about to say that Shang Haojia still needed to rest and politely decline the invitation to treat him. However, before he could say anything, the dedicated human doctor snatched the phone back, "I'm not working, my beloved senior, can you describe the situation a little more professionally – Although you are an elf who sings out of tune, don't forget that you are also a PhD candidate in the laboratory..."

"How am I being unprofessional? I've just recently been catching up on my doctor-patient communication studies and trying to paint a more vivid and understandable picture of the condition." The PhD candidate retorted defiantly and was silent for a moment before stammering again, "Anyway, he's just – he's in a coma right now! And then there's puffiness..."

"... Well, I can probably see why you've been studying for a PhD for eight years now. Even if you've been busy with work, have you completely forgotten your expertise?" Sighing bitterly, Shang Haojia shook his head hatefully and corrected the other person's not at all professional case report, "You can't determine whether it's syncope or a coma now, so you have to call it a loss of consciousness – Is the edema depressed or non-depressed, upward or downward?" (Angel: Syncope is the medical term for fainting or passing out, and edema is swelling caused by excess fluid trapped in your body's tissues.)

"I can't help it, all my spare time after school has been dedicated to singing in recent years... Say that again! I'm a laboratory researcher, how many years have passed since I studied clinical examination? Can you still remember what you studied for the college entrance exam?!" The Light Elf retorted in annoyance and his tone weakened instantly, "That, how do you tell if it's depressed or non-depressed..."

‿︵‿︵ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ・❉・ ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ‿︵‿︵

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Translator Notes

Please feel free to comment any mistakes I made so I can improve and do better as I go through the book.

Translated: November 1, 2021

Edited: August 11, 2023