Wilderness Vegetation Chapter 52

Chapter 52

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Tang Yunyan's assistant opened the door, calling out, "Hello, Lawyer Shen." Shen Zhi nodded and walked in. Toto stood on the shelf and, seeing Shen Zhi, flapped its wings and shouted, "Hubby! Hubby!"

"It's hopeless," Tang Yunyan said. "Ever since last time, it never says 'welcome' anymore. It calls everyone hubby."

Shen Zhi stared at Toto for a few seconds, and Tang Yunyan patted his arm. "Xu Yan is in the changing room. He just tried on two outfits and seemed a bit tired, so I let him rest for a while."

"Alright."

The changing room door was slightly ajar. Shen Zhi knocked twice, and no one answered. He thought Xu Yan had fallen asleep inside, so he pushed the door open.

The scene before him was indeed unexpected.

Xu Yan was wearing a black cheongsam, bent over on the floor with his bottom raised. The satin fabric outlined his figure smoothly and evenly. The slit in the skirt ran high, revealing skin from the ankle to the middle of the thigh. His protruding shoulder blades, the dip of his waist, and the taut line of his hips created an unusual artistic sense, like a black swan, despite the rather ungraceful posture.

"Fuck..." Xu Yan cursed under his breath, turning his head. He froze, his gaze following the black leather shoes upwards, past the neatly pressed trousers and blue shirt, and finally fixing on Shen Zhi's face.

It was absurd.

Shen Zhi felt like it took him a moment to recover, his Adam's apple moving slightly. He crouched down and asked, "What's wrong?"

Xu Yan remained kneeling, propping himself up slightly with his hands, frowning. "My earring fell off."

"The black diamond earring made by Designer Tang herself, if I really lose it, she'll kill me."

"Get up, I'll find it." Shen Zhi helped him stand up, then squatted down again, lifting the floor-length skirts one by one. Finally, he found the earring behind a mannequin stand.

Xu Yan was buttoning up in front of the mirror when Shen Zhi approached him, pulling out a napkin to wipe the earring post, "I'll help you put it on."

"Thanks." Xu Yan handed him an earring back and tilted his head to reveal his right ear.

He watched Shen Zhi's focused profile in the mirror as they stood close together. Shen Zhi's knuckles lightly brushed against his jawline, and the entire process took only ten seconds. After securing the earring, Shen Zhi didn't lower his hand. Despite knowing Xu Yan could see everything in the mirror, Shen Zhi still lowered his head and kissed his cheek.

Xu Yan watched everything happen. He had a premonition something like this might happen but hadn't expected Shen Zhi to act so quickly.

"I'm heading out," Xu Yan said softly, bypassing Shen Zhi as he walked out.

"This outfit suits you. Most of the male models in the company have tried it on, but you're the only one who fits the look I wanted," Tang Yunyan nodded in satisfaction as soon as she saw Xu Yan come out. "Luckily the show was postponed, otherwise, I wouldn't have had the chance to get this busy man to try it on."

Xu Yan stepped barefoot onto the platform, smiling, "Did you ever let Photographer Lu try it on?"

"I did," Tang Yunyan raised an eyebrow. "He looked stunning in that deep purple one, I'll send you the photos later."

Xu Yan felt a sense of balance in his heart.

Shen Zhi stood by the window, watching Xu Yan intently. He wasn't in a hurry, he could wait until Xu Yan finished everything he needed to do.

That particular set took more than half an hour to shoot. During this time, Shen Zhi stepped out to take two phone calls. When he returned from the balcony after the second call, Xu Yan had just gone to the changing room.

"We're done here, next, it's your turn with Photographer Xu," Tang Yunyan said while feeding Toto.

"Thanks, you've worked hard." Shen Zhi replied.

Xu Yan changed back into his own clothes, said goodbye to Tang Yunyan, and headed out, with Shen Zhi following behind. Toto watched their departing figures, swallowed the food in its mouth, and shouted, "Goodbye, hubby! See you later, hubby!"

People constantly passed by in the corridor. Xu Yan walked silently ahead, only stopping at the end, where he pushed open a door and turned to Shen Zhi, "Come in."

Shen Zhi walked a few steps into the room. It was a storage room, with shelves holding scattered boxes and wooden boards. Xu Yan closed the door and leaned against it, his expression matching what Tang Yunyan had said, he looked a little tired, "Why are you looking for me?"

"Didn't sleep well last night, or is it the exhaustion from your trip?" Shen Zhi asked, not answering the question directly.

Xu Yan lowered his gaze, his eyelashes fluttering slightly. "Didn't sleep well. What do you want?"

"I saw the news," Shen Zhi said slowly. "So I asked Lin Mian about it, and she told me that Yu Xue and Lin Yan have been together for quite a while."

Xu Yan's expression remained calm. "So? I never told you that I was with her."

That was true. When Shen Zhi first came across the rumours, he didn't think much of them, but while sitting in Tang Yunyan's office earlier, watching Xu Yan, he had pieced everything together. He realised that Xu Yan had never once confirmed a relationship with Yu Xue. All of it had been his own assumptions, and Xu Yan had merely never denied it. Shen Zhi now understood the reasons behind that.

A sense of lightness and relief washed over him, as if a heavy weight had been lifted from his chest. He had earned Xu Yan's forgiveness, and now, receiving this unexpected news, he felt even happier.

"Mhmm," Shen Zhi smiled and asked, "What time do you finish work tonight? Want to grab dinner together?"

He had already prepared himself for Xu Yan to refuse, it was fine, he could keep trying. But what he hadn't anticipated was Xu Yan's response: "Enough."

"Enough," Xu Yan said coldly, "I remember telling you last time that we could be ordinary friends. If you're going to be like that, then let's just stop.."

Shen Zhi froze for a moment, the joy in his chest swiftly turning to ice. It took him a while to react, and when he did, he said, "It's alright, if you're busy..."

"I'm free, but I won't have dinner with you." Xu Yan's mind was filled with Xu Shen's words, 'Think about your dignity.' He could forgive Shen Zhi, but he had also come to a realisation – rather than continually retreating, it was safer to firmly defend his boundaries.

That decision had solidified in his mind just moments ago, in the changing room. After Shen Zhi had lightly kissed him, his heartbeat suddenly soared and he became uncontrollably confused – Xu Yan almost stumbled as he walked out.

"Shen Zhi, I know what you're trying to do, and I know what your intentions are, it's enough," Xu Yan said bluntly. "I've already moved on with my life. Accepting you would mean destroying it, and I won't do that."

Shen Zhi took a step closer, his tone almost pleading, "You don't have to destroy anything, you can keep things as they are. I'll be careful, I won't cause any cracks or gaps, I promise."

"What can you promise? And even if you could, what good would it do?" Xu Yan shivered slightly, his voice low. "You know the saying, 'once bitten, twice shy,' but you're not the one who endured four years of emotional coldness, why should I go through that with you again?"

"Do you know how many times I wanted to secretly slap myself during those years? How many times did I doubt whether it was my fault or if you were just incapable of ever liking me? You have no idea how painful it was to hold on, knowing there was no hope. You wore my feelings down bit by bit. I'm scared now, do you understand?"

Emotions surged through Shen Zhi, making it hard to breathe. He had to take a deep breath, resting his hand on a nearby shelf to stay upright. "Xu Yan, I'm sor–"

"No need to say sorry any more, I've already forgiven you, but stop bothering me and live your life." Xu Yan cut him off, turned around, and opened the door. Without looking back, he added, "If you keep this up, I won't mind going abroad for a few more years."

The door closed, leaving the room in silence. Sunlight streamed through the glass, illuminating tiny specks of dust floating in the air. Shen Zhi stared at the particles, feeling like they were rushing into his nose and mouth, clogging his airways. His chest rose and fell violently, but breathing became harder, and the room seemed to shrink around him, like a cocoon tightening. Shen Zhi closed his eyes for a moment, took a step forward, and reached for the door handle. He pulled it open and stepped into the wide, empty corridor.

He couldn't remember how he made it through the corridor, into the elevator, and out of the company. By the time he reached his car, the ground beneath him felt like it was swaying violently. The sense of weightlessness and dizziness nearly made him collapse. He reached for the car door, but it wouldn't open, he'd forgotten to unlock it. Fumbling with the key, he finally managed to get the door open. He sat inside and groped for the storage box. The pills inside rattled loudly, the sound magnified a hundredfold in his ears, painfully loud. Shen Zhi grimaced in agony.

Swallowing a few pills, three or five, Shen Zhi couldn't tell, his throat felt parched. He wanted to drink some water, but his hand lacked the strength to lift the bottle. His legs were numb. Shen Zhi closed his eyes, his trembling hand slowly moving to his pocket to retrieve the vibrating phone. It took a lot of effort to lift it.

The words on the screen were blurry, but Shen Zhi could make out Tang Yunyan's name.

Fearing Tang Yunyan might be calling about Xu Yan, Shen Zhi tried to steady his mind and answered, but immediately regretted it, as he couldn't make a sound.

"Hello? Shen Zhi?" Tang Yunyan's voice wavered as if it were coming from far away, "My assistant said they saw you in the corridor just now, and you didn't look well, are you driving right now?"

Shen Zhi lifted his head, gasping for air, trying to say something, but it was too difficult. It felt as though he was trapped in a bottle, with thick mud continuously pouring in, gradually filling the space and trapping him.

"Shen Zhi? What's wrong? Isn't Xu Yan with you?"

He wasn't... He hadn't been for a long, long time, so long that Shen Zhi could barely remember what it felt like to have Xu Yan by his side.

Resting his forehead on the steering wheel, Shen Zhi finally managed to croak out a single, hoarse word: "Help..."

———

The author has something to say:

Help is on the way, help is on the way.

There will be more tomorrow.

‿︵‿︵ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ・❉・ ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ‿︵‿︵

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Translator Notes

Please feel free to comment any mistakes I made so I can improve and do better as I go through the book.

Translated: September 27, 2024 by Angel

Edited: October 27, 2024 by Angel