My Vampire Faints at Blood Chapter 64

Humane Disposal of Laboratory Animals

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The holy lions have always kept their word and when the appointed date arrived, Sheng Kobike arrived at the villa early with the invisibility cloak.

The transaction was a happy one, with one hand paid for and one hand delivered, and the lion immediately looked radiant in his wig. After doing two happy circles and lingering in front of the mirror, he agreed without hesitation to the vampire's request to temporarily block off air traffic to the auction house.

"You should be able to manage the bats, I'll talk to the owls, one night at the most, any longer and we'll have to report it – you'll have to do everything quickly, I'll pretend my mane is too long to see anything." There were not many animals out at night, and only a few with wings. Sheng Kobike patted himself on the back and, without asking what was going on, agreed readily and fluttered his huge wings into the air, impatient to get away. 

Until the hulking figure of the holy lion was no longer visible, there was still a loud, faint roar of thunder in the sky: "Come and see, daughter-in-law, I've got hair – real hair this time! I'm not going to lie, I just shaved it off a lion's head!"

Having only just gotten off work, he rushed all the way back to get ready for the auction. The human doctor fiddled with the invisibility cloak identical to Harry Potter's with interest, and while busy stuffing a sandwich into his mouth, he asked a curious follow-up question. "I wonder if the lions left any trace... Did you give them chilli sticks afterwards?"

"Please don't worry, my dear – those lion spirits will grow their manes back in just one night. I've already sent them three boxes of chilli sticks, and I hear they're selling like hotcakes in the zoo, the animals love these snacks for their amusement." Wei Long nodded with a smile, refilled his cup of tea, and sat leisurely beside him, "Jialun's younger brother is very interested in this business, and if he manages to get into the zoo, it will probably become a stable long-term business."

"Jialun's brother – what breed is he?" Thinking about the various distinctive looks of the wolves he'd seen over the past few days, the human doctor choked on his milk tea and coughed twice. Looking up in dismay, he couldn't really think of how a werewolf was supposed to blend inside a zoo – after all, Zhen Xi was just an example, and in his knowledge base, most of those werewolves still maintained their upright walking human form despite being able to grow fur.

Originally, he had been disappointed that he hadn't been able to get a black market ticket, but he hadn't expected to be able to be brought in by that old-fashioned vampire. Not yet realising that he had become a free punching bag, the werewolf butler stood gleefully in front of the mirror, agonising over which outfit he should wear out of the house, and when he heard the human doctor's query, he replied in a nonchalantly smooth manner, "Look at what you're asking, since he's my brother, he's certainly a husky too – could he have been one of those stupid Alaskans?"

"Jialun's younger brother's bloodline leans a little more towards his mother's, so he has never been accepted into werewolf society. He approached me during the day today and said he wanted to try to see if he could blend inside the wolf park, and I don't think they're really that different in appearance, so it should still be possible." Looking at the werewolf butler whose mind had long since flown to the auction, the vampire helplessly laughed lightly and had to patiently explain what was going on for his human. 

Shang Haojia's hand paused while holding his cup of tea as he couldn't help but imagine a husky and a pack of wolves falling in love with each other, then nodded in solemn respect, "That's really ideal... By the way, what about the fox, are we really going to send it to the zoo?"

"The cage you asked for is done, I applied three coats of talisman water on it to seal the demon beast's power for seventy-two hours – Also, according to the information, I think that Bi'an egg of yours is about to crack its shell. You'd better take it out with you today, lest the little one can't find out who his father is when he opens his eyes." Before his words had even fallen, Yan Maifan came down from the first floor and tossed over the tiny golden silk cage containing the snow fox. He himself followed suit and sat down by the sofa, handing the dragon egg, already covered in strange patterns, to the human doctor.

The Bi'an egg had been moving more and more frequently over the past two days, and the egg shell had been covered with more fantastic patterns. The Bi'an population was very scarce and the dragon family had no experience in raising them, so the two were worried that something was wrong and asked Yan Maifan to find out the cause, but they didn't expect that they would have to add another mouth so soon.

However, it was his own egg, and although he felt a lot of pressure, the human doctor's heart was still filled with anticipation. He took the dragon egg and thanked him, but then he asked a few more questions without fear, "Many thanks, don't we have to worry about it being accidentally touched and broken?"

"Don't worry, the dragon's shell is harder than most things, and the dragon itself is pretty much the only one who can break it. In a critical situation, you can probably still produce a high physical damage index by taking it and aiming it at the enemy's vitals and throwing it at them." Yan Maifan nodded earnestly and turned his attention back to the snow fox in the cage, casually unlatching it, pulling out the now palm-sized snow fox and placing it on the table, "By the way, I've always had trouble drawing that vermilion flame tattoo, your doctor has a steadier hand than I do, so you can let him try."

The vampire exchanged a glance with him, then nodded, took out his phone and placed it on the table, "My dear, do you know how to draw this kind of flame pattern?"

Looking at the promotional artwork of what looked like a second-tier online game on his phone, Doctor Shang couldn't help but raise an eyebrow and gently put the dragon egg in his hand aside. Taking the brush and vermilion water from the two little dragons, he examined the snow fox that was slowly melting on the table, "What's this for, it doesn't look good?"

"That's what we finally came up with in our discussion – after all, the snow fox is so worthless compared to the nine-tailed fox." The vampire nodded slightly in a serious manner, but didn't forget his doctor's roots. Pushing the snow fox forward, he looked sincerely at his human doctor, "Rest assured, my dear – at Galleff's auction, all deals are possible as long as someone is willing to auction it off. Dyeing young bear-men to disguise them as baby pandas, passing off ostrich eggs as dragon eggs, having carp spirits change only halfway to claim to be mermaids, and so on are all very common and perfectly permissible and acceptable among non-human races, depending on whether the buyer's eyesight can actually see it."

With a gradually deepening understanding of the non-human race, Shang Haojia had no doubt that someone would definitely fall for such a trick. He picked the snow fox up by the head with one hand and made a few strokes from the sample drawing, but then suddenly remembered an important question, "I see – I can try to draw it and see, but isn't a nine-tailed fox supposed to have nine tails?" 

Obviously prepared for this question, the vampire nodded with a smile and gently patted the two little dragons, "Thanks to their help, the props are completely prepared."

Although the two little ones were familiar with both of them, they were obviously still closer to the human doctor. The last time Wei Long tried to touch Xian Bao's dragon horns, he was bitten on the finger by the little one who hadn't completely gotten rid of the husky gene, and actually whimpered and shook his head while holding his hand in his mouth. The Golden Dragon, who was passing by, saw the scene and beat the unruly son up right then and there along with his other dad.

He really doesn't want to recall the time when there was rain in the local area that almost flooded the cottage. Under the vehement protest of the gnome gardener, the pureblood king, who would rarely be afraid of anything that existed, finally had to bow down to the dragons and be on constant alert for any unexpected situation that could cause rainfall.

"Brother Doctor, Brother Doctor, we've discovered a secret – snow foxes grow their fur extra fast!" When it was finally time to offer their treasure, the two little ones, who had been working all day, jumped up and down in excitement, diving into the wardrobe and rummaging around. After several trips back and forth, they came up with eight fake fox tails.

"Don't let me see them – just send me to the zoo, you guys, sell me or whatever! Or else hurry up and boil me to feed that little ancestor, I'm still quite big when I turn back, really quite big, there should be enough for him to eat half a meal!" At the sight of the eight snow-white fake tails, the originally lifeless Arctic fox suddenly leapt to his feet. Not caring that the hard ground paved with stones was below, he gave a tearful cry and plunged headlong into the ground.

The two little dragons looked at each other and lunged forward with skill. One wrapped itself around the snow fox's neck, the other held its tail securely in its grip and they waved the snow-white fox through the air twice like a ramen noodle before throwing it unceremoniously back onto the table.

"How many times have you guys plucked his hair here..." There was no shortage of hair pulled from rabbits' ears back in the days of experimentation, and the sight of the puddle of snow fox on the table quickly gave the human doctor a grasp of what was going on. Although he did not have a soft spot for this bad snow fox, he still, in the spirit of the principle that he should treat it humanely from the standpoint of the experimental animal and euthanize it if necessary, he habitually touched its neck and tapped his index finger twice on the location where the cervical vertebrae had been severed.

"What are you doing – I, I, I'm telling you, if you're still expecting to sell me to feed your Taotie, don't do anything to me!" Although he was unsure of the human doctor's intentions for this action, his beastly instincts caused the snow fox's neck hair to stand up in fear and he instantly exploded into a snowball. Rolling on the ground to avoid the demon's hand, he dove into the corner of the cage with a jerk.

The human doctor, who had not yet realised what he had done, raised an eyebrow, his hand stopping in mid-air as he looked innocently at the frightened and deformed fox in front of him. The snow fox blew up and crouched for a long moment, taking another wary glance at his scowl before darting his paws out and pulling those tails in with him, shivering and clutching them to his chest.

Sure enough, this human was the great demon king – humans are really scary!

‿︵‿︵ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ・❉・ ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ‿︵‿︵

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Translator Notes

Please feel free to comment any mistakes I made so I can improve and do better as I go through the book.

Translated: May 18, 2022

Edited: August 24, 2023