My Vampire Faints at Blood Chapter 6

Beware of Air Conditioning in Summer

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"It turned out to be like this…" Wei Long’s expression suddenly became a little gloomy. He lowered his head and was silent for a moment, then sighed extremely lightly, turned around, and stopped talking.

Seeing his abnormal behaviour, Doctor Shang’s sense of responsibility spontaneously made him feel a little regret, and he raised his hand to pat his shoulder, "I’m sorry, I like to make jokes, I didn’t mean to make you sad. Don’t let it get to your heart–"

Before he could finish his words, the man suddenly turned around. His handsome, pale face was not showing half of the disappointment that he expected, on the contrary, it was filled with a smile that was even more enthusiastic than usual.

Before Shang Haojia could react, Wei Long suddenly held his other hand gracefully and poked his cheek, "You are really a very considerate gentleman, and this is what I admire the most. These kinds of words really don’t need to be taken to heart, of course I know this. After all, it dates back to a very long time in the past. The original purpose of vampires sleeping in coffins was to startle humans."

"Then you vampires – really are boring…" Shang Haojia was exhausted physically and mentally because of his dramatic ups and downs. He sighed with a headache and sat down on the hard bed, "If Mr. Wei has nothing else, I probably plan to rest. Can you help me close the window?"

"With all due respect – perhaps this would be offensive to you, but it is a bit shabby if such a place is used for rest." Wei Long looked around and shook his head somewhat regretfully.

Shang Haojia didn’t feel any offence, he just rolled up his clothes and put them behind him, and leaned against the wall, "It’s not shabby. My parents moved house while I was away and didn’t even leave anything to greet you."

"Putting a gentleman in such a situation, but just watching and not lending a helping hand, is really a very unmannered behaviour." Just as Wei Long spoke, he remembered Shang Haojia’s small request before, and his gorgeous and elegant invitation stopped halfway. After a while of careful consideration, he stretched his hand out enthusiastically, “Come to my house, I invite you to dinner."

"No need, I–" Shang Haojia instinctively wanted to decline, but there was suddenly a sound that came from his stomach, giving him no face.

After hesitating for less than a second between being vigilant and filling his stomach, the pragmatic Doctor Shang changed his words without hesitation, "… Where is your home, is it far away?"

"Not far, I drove over." Quickly mastering the way of communicating with the other party, Wei Long stretched his hand out to him and slightly leaned over gracefully, with a satisfied and determined smile in his eyes.

There is no free lunch in this world. After buying a subway ticket, Shang Haojia, who was already penniless, decided to give in to the evil old capitalist power. Recognizing his fate, he stretched his hand out and was steadily pulled up by him.

The opponent’s hand was unexpectedly cold, but it slowly filled with a slight warmth. Shang Haojia looked at the smile in his eyes in astonishment, and shook the hand that was obviously bearing the temperature of life, "There is no blood flow, no mitochondria for energy, how did you do it?"

"It’s not that difficult. Humans have many interesting inventions, such as this kind of thing called a warm water bag." Wei Long laughed lightly and handed him the small warm water bag from his pocket, "How about it, do you want to try it?"

"Forget it, right now I’m so hot that I’m almost burning." Shang Haojia waved his hand quickly, refusing the other party’s proposal without hesitation.

Wei Long chuckled, "You humans are really sensitive to temperature, like a fragile and delicate work of art. It’s easy to be ruined, but it’s so perfect that you can’t bear to let it go."

"Simple, remember to be simple." After successfully comprehending the effective way of communicating with the other party, Shang Haojia waved his hand and stopped him in time before he was about to start a long talk again.

Wei Long paused tacitly, and changed his words, "… I mean, you are so cute."

"I thought that after a brief period, there would be no such numbing effect, but now it seems that it is not much better…"  Shang Haojia shivered and shook his head, "Forget it, let’s go quickly – Wait, do you have air conditioning at your house?" Considering that the other party was an existence who could run around with a warm water bag in this kind of weather, Shang Haojia suddenly became deeply worried and suspicious about this matter.

Wei Long seemed to like to see him worrying. He deliberately pondered for a while, then smiled and nodded, "Don't worry, although I don't have a clear sense of the temperature change, our werewolf friend is no better than you."

"That’s good, we can be friends with air conditioning, and there is no problem in letting me lie down in the coffin with you." Hearing his assurance, Shang Haojia finally breathed a sigh of relief. Suddenly, he felt a sincere gratitude towards this werewolf friend.

"In fact – in order to integrate into modern society, I also tried your human bed, and fell in love with Simmons deeply, unable to control myself. Perhaps my opinion is a bit biassed, but Simmons must be one of the greatest inventions of mankind. If I want to petrify in the future, I must customise a Simmons coffin." Wei Long couldn’t help but chuckle as he solemnly replied. He opened the window thoughtfully and opened his arms to him again.

"Can’t we leave the house in a normal way?" Seeing his movements, Shang Haojia couldn't help but complain in a low voice, but he picked up his belongings and walked to the window eagerly.

Wei Long stepped forward and suddenly embraced him lightly, tilting his head slightly and putting it near his ear with a smile, whispering in a low voice, "Looking at such a quiet and seductive night, don't you have the urge to be with me and melt into this night?"

The effect of the warm water bag can only be confined to the palm of his hand. The long-lost coolness wrapped Shang Haojia's whole body, making him unable to help but sigh comfortably, "There is no urge to blend into the night, but the urge to be with you can continue for a while..."

"If I had known that disguising myself as an air conditioner would have earned such a special reputation, I would have embraced you without hesitation long ago." Looking at the person who was almost on his body, Wei Long's tone was a little more indulgent, and he raised his hand and patted his back lightly, "Hold me tightly, don't open your eyes."

"Relax, I don't have a fear of heights..." Shang Haojia didn't feel nervous, so he answered lazily. As he was about to show off with his heroic deeds of climbing stairs to get the keys in his childhood, his body suddenly rose into the sky. The surrounding landscape quickly changed into a starry sky, and before he could react, he fell straight down.

"Every time you jump off a building – are you so wasteful of gravity?!" As an emergency doctor, Doctor Shang, who has dealt with all kinds of jumping-off injuries all year round, undoubtedly knows the consequences. Sincerely, he spoke in shock, and his tone almost turned into an exclamation mark at the end.

There was a deep chuckle in his ear, with overly obvious malicious joy and delight. He couldn't help but itch with hate, but inexplicably, the voice that seemed to resonate in his chest, caused a tremor in his heart.

Vampires are indeed a dangerous existence that can very easily tempt humans.

Very dangerous.

‘Cherish life and stay away from vampires – Watching the scenery on the ground rapidly zoom in in front of you, your ears are filled with the sound of wind.’ Shang Haojia suddenly decided that he must add this sentence to his epitaph.

"In many film and television works, there are actually serious exaggerations and deviations in the description of our strength." The strong fall was suddenly stopped. Wei Long stood steadily on a branch, and as the branch under his feet swayed up and down several times, he once again embraced the person in his arms and jumped up lightly. "In fact, we vampires do not have the ability to go into the sky, nor do we fly. The reason why we can expand the space of action infinitely is only because we jump higher than humans."

‿︵‿︵ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ・❉・ ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ‿︵‿︵

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Translator Notes

Wei Long said he would speak in simpler words... but that didn't last long (┬┬﹏┬┬)

Please feel free to comment any mistakes I made so I can improve and do better as I go through the book.

Translated: May 8, 2021

Edited: July 28,2023