My Vampire Faints at Blood Chapter 55

Alcoholism Affects Sperm Quality

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"Haidi – now is not the time to talk about this, can we talk about this at home?" For the first time, the Tibetan fox was complimented on his appearance, and his eyes showed a bit of flattery. However, he still blushed a little at the young phoenix's blunt wording, and his voice lowered involuntarily.

"By the way, we have to go back to talk about this kind of thing – in fact, I have something I’ve hidden from you too. I can transform as well, but this place is so small that I probably won't fit..." The little phoenix nodded happily and took hold of the Tibetan fox's little plum blossom paw again, tiptoeing and lowering his voice: "When we get home, I'll transform for you, okay?"

"Okay, let's talk about it when we get home." Looking dotingly at the little phoenix in front of him, the Tibetan fox's long, narrow eyes finally curved a little, and he gently rubbed his head, "Can I change back now? If outsiders see me, they'll think I'm wearing a hood and will be sure to help me take it off immediately..."

"I'm angry! Really angry!" Looking at these two people who actually managed to make out in this situation, Wayne Loki was so angry that his eyes glowed red, and after bouncing around twice in tears, he suddenly turned his cannon fire to the human doctor on the side, "Aren't you a doctor? Can't you fix his eyes! I don't believe it, my young master is such a suave figure, but he's not as good as a squinty-eyed fox!"

"Please forgive me for not being able to do anything about it – in this case, I'd still prefer to eat my hotpot on the sidelines..." Doctor Shang shook his head, and with a soft sigh, he shoved the little bottomless pit in his arms into the hands of his vampire, "Send him back first, if he stays here–"

"Hot, hotpot!" Before he could finish his words, the little Taotie suddenly grabbed the vampire's arm and nuzzled gently between his arms, blinking his round eyes pleadingly, "Hotpot..." 

Looking at the pureblood king's eyes that had turned red instantly from the adorableness, Doctor Shang suddenly felt a slight sense of foreboding. Not bothering to spit out the fact that the first word the little one learned was actually hotpot, he clutched his vampire's wrist, "Hold on, you're his father, you have to have principles–"

"Oh my god, that's so cute – can I pet him!" The little phoenix clearly had a strong interest in all types of mammals with fur. Only when he looked away from his Tibetan fox did he catch a glimpse of the blinking little kitten and let out a loud cry of happiness, instantly forgetting his fear of the Taotie, and pounced towards him eagerly.

The little kitten tilted its head up and sniffed. Smelling the delicious hotpot smell on him, it flapped its paws towards him twice, and its voice cheered up: "Hotpot!"

"I'm not called hotpot, I'm called Haidi Lao, and Haidi Lao is the king of hotpots! If you let me pet you, I'll treat you to a meal, okay?" (Angel: Haidilao is a hot pot restaurant chain that was founded in Sichuan in 1994.)

After proudly flaunting his status, the little phoenix eagerly stretched out his hand and was just about to pet the cat when the human doctor pressed his arm and shook his head solemnly, "You know nothing of Taotie's power – you can't ask him to open his mouth, if he does, this shop of yours will be empty in the blink of an eye."

Understanding what his human father meant, the little Taotie's eyes, which were still shining, instantly dimmed. Aggrieved, he dropped his ears and slumped on the vampire's palm with tears in his eyes, "Hotpot..."

"Ahhh no – don't do that, I can't bear it!" The little phoenix struggled to hold his head and shook it with difficulty, instantly caught in the dilemma of whether to earn money for food or pet a cat.

Amidst the anxious situation, the pureblood king, who had been silent for a long time, finally raised his head. With a slight red glint in his eyes, he looked inquiringly at the human doctor beside him, "My dear, can I trade a treasure for this hotpot restaurant?"

"That is simply too much to ask! I am a noble phoenix who is not motivated by profit, and our clan has never treated money like dirt... Is the treasure big? What is it filled with? Is there anything of value?" Before the human could say anything, the little phoenix interrupted him with great righteousness. Striding over, he suddenly grabbed the vampire's arm and both his pupils turned into the shape of copper coins that were round on the outside and square on the inside, "I actually have another branch that sells nirvana pin skewers, which I can also package up and trade to you! All these shop staff are yours, you can take this and you won't have to pay them..."

The plot often develops unexpectedly, and before the human doctor, who was used to working twenty-four seven, could figure out the situation, the two sides had happily reached an agreement.

The little phoenix groped behind his back twice before pulling off another tail feather and shoving it at the vampire and snatching up the ruby key he handed him. As if he was afraid he would regret it, he picked up the still unresponsive Tibetan fox, shouted long live the treasure and darted out of the hot pot restaurant without looking back.

With a clear phoenix cry, the half-fire-red, half-silver-white phoenix rose into the air. Its graceful form soared through the night sky, bringing up a cloud of ice crystals and fire, which intersected and flowed into a dazzling light that broke through the quiet night sky.

"So it looks like the phoenix is quite beautiful." For the moment, he put aside his astonishment at the inhuman race's overly casual dealings. The human doctor tilted his head and looked up at the phoenix soaring proudly in the night sky, unable to resist a heartfelt sigh of admiration.

"That's right – the phoenix is indeed a noble and graceful creature that also possesses extremely magical powers. It is precisely because of this that many magicians spend their lives chasing a wand made of a phoenix tail feather, such a tail feather could even buy another treasure at an auction..." The vampire with exceptional eyesight glanced towards the sky, thoughtfully not poking at the fact that the phoenix's tail had almost gone bald. With a gentle voice, he leaned down slightly towards him with an apology, "My dear, I hope you weren't offended by the recklessness of what I just did – his pads pressed into my hands and I just couldn't resist his demands..."

"Don't spoil him so much next time, children who are spoiled too much are not easy to manage in the future." Having already bought it, Shang Haojia wasn't going to say anything more. He shook his head and smiled, then walked back towards the restaurant with him, "Did you look carefully just now to see if it that Jia Duobao was the one who injured your brother or not? I didn't get the impression that he was very aggressive, and there were a lot of questionable statements..." 

"It obviously wasn't him, his claw marks were plum-shaped and the tips of his claws weren't very sharp, giving him little to no advantage in hunting. If I am correct, he should, like Jialun, be the product of a failed hybrid and an existence banished from the family." As soon as he spoke of the matter at hand, the vampire's gaze followed suit and he shook his head seriously, "Based on the conversation between him and Wayne Loki, the two of them should not have just met each other. It's likely that the two families were originally related, and he was only the nominal young master of another werewolf family, but had in fact left that family..."

"By the way – where's Wayne Loki?" Now suddenly remembering that there seemed to be someone missing, Shang Haojia subconsciously stood still and looked around, but the bloodsucking ball had long since disappeared, "Where did he run off to, nothing will happen to him, right?"

"Please don't worry, he just went out to get drunk because he lost his love. I thought that perhaps he should be allowed to calm down alone, so I didn't stop him." Wei Long shook his head with a light smile and explained in a warm voice, before suddenly turning around with a sense of purpose and looking at a figure walking far away in the night.

Looking at the visitor, the king of the purebloods still wore a calm smile in his eyes, but his tone had already sunken slightly: "Look – hasn't he been sent back?"

Hearing the gravity in his tone, Shang Haojia raised some caution in his heart. Subconsciously, he raised his head and looked towards the figure that was getting closer and closer.

Wayne Loki was already drunk and was being carried back like a sack. The man who appeared was wearing glasses and a straight suit, slightly similar to the Yan Tianshi who lived in the villa, only more refined and elegant. He was carrying a vampire yet he looked very relaxed, his face not red and his breath not laboured, and his pace still quite steady.

"Excuse me, is he a friend of yours?" Standing in front of the two, the man's gaze paused on Wei Long for a moment, and with a thoughtful push of his glasses, he lowered the vampire on his shoulder, "This little cutie who lost all his teeth was drinking in my shop, singing 'Single Love Song' non-stop and steadfastly refusing requests for a different song, causing general discontent among the diners. I thought I should send him back to his kin and followed the scent – by the way, you're well dressed and look much more pleasant than your kinsmen."

"Dad, Dad, help me, I don't want to be caught..."

It wasn't until Wayne Loki was put down that Shang Haojia realised he wasn't drunk, but rather too scared to move. As soon as he landed, he hid behind the two men on all fours and poked his head out again, looking warily at the bar owner in front of him.

"So you're his father? I was wondering when the bloods suddenly gained another pureblood, it seems you are the famous pureblood king." With a flash of surprise in his eyes, the visitor took a step forward and offered his hand with a light smile, "I've heard a lot about you, I grew up listening to your legends – Your Highness Wei Long."

"Your power is strong, you seem to be the direct heir of at least one of the four great families, why don't you introduce yourself?" Meeting his gaze, a faint hint of blood roamed through Wei Long's eyes, his fangs looming. Shaking his hand, he picked up a warm smile as well.

"I am ashamed to say – as you know, our clan exerts its power through singing. Due to some problems with my cooperation with an elven gentleman during the last test at the Special Department, I failed the song and was knocked back down in rank from A to C. I was also punished by the clan with a year's confinement until the next test." The visitor took off his glasses and gently wiped the lenses, smiling to himself and sighing softly in helplessness, before he stood up straight again. Holding his right hand in the crook of his left arm, he bowed courteously and slightly towards him, "Now that the next assessment is just around the corner, I have the misfortune of drawing that elven gentleman again. I am pondering whether or not to withdraw from the examination and give up this status... but at least for now, allow me to still introduce myself in this way – I am a vampire hunter. The third heir of the Zhuge family, Zhuge Kaoyu, please guide me."

‿︵‿︵ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ・❉・ ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ‿︵‿︵

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Translator Notes

I have created a character guide that may be helpful for remembering characters Doctor Shang has encountered throughout this story. I will update it whenever we meet new people. You can find it ⇥here⇤

Please feel free to comment any mistakes I made so I can improve and do better as I go through the book.

Translated: March 26/27, 2022

Edited: August 18, 2023